Camping in the Rain
A mind that is stretched by a new experience can never go back to its old dimensions.
Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
A view of the start of Appalachia at sunset
The thing about
camping in the rain
is that when the rain stops
you go outside-
and you are lighter,
the world is lighter,
the birds are singing again
and a little joy creeps back
into your heart
and you walk the muddy path
splashing just a little bit more
than strictly necessary
smiling like you never saw the sun
until just today
when it pushed its way
past the heavy clouds
and shined.
Rain-soaked White Cave Path at Mammoth Cave National Park, where my boots got muddy, and I smiled to be back outside.
Tall grass flattened by rushing rainwater on the hillside next to the path to the historic cave entrance at Mammoth Cave
A journey is a person in itself; no two are alike. And all plans, safeguards, policing, and coercion are fruitless. We find that after years of struggle that we do not take a trip; a trip takes us.
John Steinbeck
This trip was not what I expected. I expected quiet and peace and trails and warm nights reading by a campfire. What I got was a lot of rain. Thunder. Tornado and hail warnings. More rain. Flooded campgrounds. Then, periodically, the sun would come out and I would get out and go. It made every moment I spent outside really special. In Arkansas, I got to experience the warm steam rising from the ground at Hot Springs National Park on a cold day. In Tennessee, I got to run along the Mississippi River. In Alabama, I got to hike with my sister, Rita at a beautiful little trail system near her home. In Kentucky, I ventured into a deep cave (see last week’s post here) and came out with a resolution to face my fears instead of avoiding them, and I’m excited about that shift in my attitude. The trip wasn’t what I expected at all; but on reflection, I think it was exactly what I needed it to be.
Now I am home in Michigan, where all the spring flowers are blooming early. The air is cool and crisp in the morning, and the neighborhood animals (and the neighbors!) are making me feel welcome. I’m so happy to be here. Thank you for being here with me. See you next week.
a mass of lilies of the valley cover the ground in the woods near my home
Claustrophobia in the Caves
The ground of fearlessness is fear. In order to be fearless, you have to stand in the middle of your fear.
Larry Rosenberg
the metal door slams.
I’m trapped.
the walls are close
the steps are narrow
so many people
so little air
so far
down
we go
so deep
earth
pressing
in
on
me
the guide turns out the lights to tell us how this section of the cave was discovered
i stay behind the rest of the group, a shadow of fear
I feel myself lightening up a little as the cave widens, and I know the exit is not far
a stalactite chandelier in the Frozen Niagra
Smile, breathe and go slowly.
Nhat Hanh
From the safe distance of a few days, several hundred miles and a bit of perspective, my claustrophobic panic in the Mammoth Cave seems like a bad dream. I have made somewhat of a joke of this fear I have of being trapped, but this two hour tour in Mammoth Cave National Park, called Domes and Dripstones, made me realize how bad my claustrophobia has really become. I made it through the cave tour and was even feeling pretty light at the end, when I knew my exit was near - but I’ve had a residual feeling of panic and resistance afterward. I think it’s time I learn to face this. I understand now that I’m not only afraid of being trapped, but I’m afraid of the panic I experience when feeling trapped. I am afraid of my fear. I can only see that getting worse if I don’t work with it. Do you have any “irrational” fears? Do you have any ideas about how to work with them? I’d love to hear what you think.
Hope you have a great weekend. See you next week!
My last morning at Mammoth Cave it rained, and then a fog blanketed everything.
